Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Jodie Sweetin has a FULL HOUSE if you know what I mean...




I knew there was a reason I loved watching Full House.
It certainly wasn't for freakin Dave Coulier's(Joey) comical stylings.

Posted By Ryan

What the Heck does Lauren Conrad have to write about?




Today, was a sad day for the Human race when I found out the Hills star, Lauren Conrad came to the Grove to whore her new book L.A. Candy to mindless lemmings. 
The last time we saw L.C. she was saying goodbye to the Hills forever. I thought she was also saying goodbye being in the public limelight but like Usher's marriage, I made mistake.
Conrad, 22, has signed on to write three-books series of young adult fiction for Harper Collins. 
Legendary authors like Woolf,  Orwell, Faulkner, Hemingway, & Bukowski are turning over in their graves.

Posted By Ryan

This is why we don't have a Los Angeles football team

We have too many fuckin idiots and psychos in L.A.

Oh yeah, Fuck Kobe Bryant...



Posted By Ryan

The Genius Machine gets the Case on the Mundays...

We wanted to show all our fans out there in the World Wide Web that we work hard for your entertainment needs...Not really, it's a fucking Monday, fuck working.





Have fun working at your sorry ass jobs Losers...

Posted By Ryan

Friday, June 12, 2009

A Paparazzi Lifestyle


A PAPS LIFE

They say a picture is worth a 1000 words...but that's bullshit, cause some pictures are worth a lot more then that and most are worse a lot less.

A paparazzi is like a hitman for suburban moms, we hunt what they want. If moms want to see Megan Fox and call her a slut, then the horde descends on her. If they want to see if the new American Idol guy has a boyfriend, then that is our target. Some paps will shoot everything and anything. They are like mass murderers, anyone is a target, and in truth no one is that special.

But then there are the specialists, the true hunters, the ones who wait for that picture that is worth more then 1000 bucks......I am not this type.

When my phone used to ring at 5am it meant I had to go bail a friend out of jail, but now, now it means I have to go shoot someone. Pop quiz hotshot, if you werelying in bed with two girls and the phone rings and your boss wants you to go to LAX and shoot Paul Reubens what do you do?
Well if you do anything that takes you out of the bed then you are a fool, and since I had my birthday the day before, the beers, pot, coke, and well whatever else I could get into my blood were still fucking me up, Paul would have to wait.  One of the worst things is to go PAP when you are doing coke.

Coke is a hell of a drug, except it is not really the best paparazzi enhancement. Shaking of the camera is not usually encouraged, and after a full night bender I could was shaking so much I looked like I had freaking Parkinson's. Also, being in California it is hot to begin with, add the coke, and you end up sweating like fighter trying to make weight. So I didn't think Paul wanted to see a shaking, sweating pap waiting for him before his flight to DC.


Posted By Ro

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Mickey Rourke the new Villan in Iron Man 2


Insanely dressed actor, Mickey Rourke, is schedule to play a new villan in the new Iron Man 2. 

Paramount has released that the Mickey Rourke will play Whiplash against Tony Stark, Robert Downey Jr.

Scarlett Johansson will also take on Iron Man in the eagerly anticipated sequel, due in theaters May 7, 2010.

Check out this video about how we feel about Mickey's dress code.




Posted by Ryan

That Goodness for Plastic Surgery




What a Nose job does to boost up your career and love life.
Just ask the hotter sister of Hilary Duff, Haylie, was spotted out with her boyfriend Nick Zano shopping in Hollywood. Haylie showed off her brand new part of her anatomy to photographers as she smiled and giggled.
It wasn't too long ago that she was the love interest of Napoleon Dynamite but now she can be seen in fine movies like Food Fight, starring Charlie Sheen and her sister, Hilary.
If we could only give out rhinoplasty to eveyone...

Posted By Ryan